The newest installment of The Writer’s Closet is up. It’s a song called “Baby, There’s Still Me.” Here’s the message behind the music:
“It’s Better on MySpace.” That’s what her shirt said. Her eyes said it too. I had seen her earlier walking through the mall with her boyfriend. Now she sat on a bench near the food court and was currently necking (as the old folks call it) with said boyfriend. From the neck down she was totally invested in this guy and in what they were doing. But in her eyes she looked… bored… distracted. She looked like she was thinking much harder than a person should while participating in full blown PDA.
Her shirt said it all. “It’s Better on MySpace.” It’s better when you make up a new you. It’s better when you can give details about yourself that impress people, whether they are true or not. It’s better when you can show people photos of yourself that make you look your best, whether they really look like you or not. It’s better when you can make the person on the outside come across as someone others will like and maybe even love. Because you are not so sure they might like (or love) the person on the inside.
So we play this game. We buy the right clothes. We drive the right cars. We get the right jobs. We hang out with the right people. We sell sex for love and we sell love for sex. We say the right things. We act tough when we really feel scared. We act pretty when we really feel ugly. Inside we really just want to be loved, to be accepted, to be found worthy more than anything else. And we’ll do just about anything to get it.
The problems come when the truth comes out – when we wear the wrong clothes, when we drive the wrong cars, when we take the wrong job, when we hang out with the wrong people, when we say the wrong things. When our true self comes out it totally discounts the “better” self, and therefore it totally discounts any love, acceptance, or worthiness that came with it.
Love based on lies is no love at all.
God doesn’t work this way. God says nothing could separate us from His love (Romans 8). This means that nothing we are ashamed of – our failures, our blunders, our mistakes, our weaknesses, our doubts – nothing would make Him love us less. It also means that nothing could Him love us more – the right clothes, the right car, the right job, the right friends, our strength, our glamour – none of it will earn His love. Simply said, we don’t have to play the game with God. He loves us just as we are.
The sooner we accept this truth is the sooner that we really are better.
I hope you enjoy the new song, “Baby, There’s Still Me.” Its available for a free download this month on The Writer’s Closet, my Home page, and, yes, on MySpace.
Also, I need your vote at Indie Heaven “Church or a Brothel” is currently #30 on the fan faves chart, and #3 on the Rock chart. If you’d like to see my song climb to the top of the chart, vote here.
Filed under: God, environment, life, people | Tags: david herndon, going green, mvule project, the greatest commandment
I wanted to expand on last week’s entry about “going green.” If you missed out on that entry, be sure to catch up because its not about what you think its about based on that summation.
I firmly believe that we (human beings) get things backwards sometimes. We know our world is messed up, so we try to fix the world - and not the people that live on the world, control the world, destroy the world, etc. Example: We try to “go green” by inventing hybrids, building recycling stations, and growing “organic” products. You can produce all the hybrids you want, but if people still don’t care about other people, things are never going to really change. I believe this is what Jesus had in mind when he said the most important commandment was to love god via loving people. If every human being genuinely cared about every other human being (or at least every other human being), then I believe our world would be a lot greener… in more ways than one. None of this is to say that I don’t support the green movement. I do. I believe loving people and loving the planet are two important things. I also believe you can combine the two for one dynamic, world-changing effect.
Here are some ways you can go green and love people at the same time (go green via loving people)
1. Car Pool Evangelism/Discipleship: If you’re a Christian, you probably have that certain person really want to share Christ with. Effective evangelism and discipleship requires time, it requires a relationship. Often this relationship is with someone you spend a lot of time with, a fellow student, a co-worker, etc. So, what better way to initiate more time together (for talking/listening/sharing) than a car pool? You could lead someone to Christ and cut down on harmful emissions.
2. Feed the Hungry, Not the Landfill: Do an inventory of everything you use on a weekly basis in your home, from food to laundry detergent to toilet paper. Try to categorize these things (and more importantly the quantity you use) into three categories: absolutely necessary; beneficial but not necesarry; and pure pleasure. Try going a month using only the “absolutely necessary” category. Use the extra money you save at Wal-Mart that month to sponsor a mission organization, a church, or another benevolent charity. You’ll cut down on waste, probably lose some weight, and help the needy community. Take it a step further and go a year using only the “absolutely necessary” category.
3. Save the Ozone/Save a Village: The Mvule Project is a great organization to sponsor. Visit their site to get all of the wonderful trees, but here are the basics: Certain regions in Africa have been completely deforested, the people lack education, employment, and health care to name a few. When you buy an Mvule tree from the Mvule project you ultimately provide job opportunities and stimulate economic growth which leads to the building of schools, churches, and hospitals. Your one tree will change the future of generations. You’ll also be helping to alleviate the deforestation problem that is facing the globe.
Those are a few of my favorites. Sound Cheesy? A little. Simple? Yes. But real change does not happen over night. It happens in small steps. We can all take at least one step. I have more to list, and will do so in the future. In the meantime, please share your ideas about how to go green via loving people. More importantly, act on your ideas!
Filed under: God, environment, life, people, religion | Tags: christianity, church, david herndon, environment, God, going green, hybrid, recycling
Its been a while since I posted a controversial blog. I know you’ve all been waiting for one, so here you go:
With gas prices soaring and global warming heating up, everyone from Woody Harrelson to Rob Bell has something to say about “going green.” It is a real issue and the state of the environment is something we all need to seriously think about. It is also a movement that is on the rise within Christianity and the Church’s voice on the matter gets louder every day. As an avid outdoors person myself, I am a big supporter of the “go green” movement. That being said, I do have some concerns with the way it is being presented in Christian circles. It seems that the Christian view is being taught that if you are a believer, yet are not environmentally conscious or active, then you are committing a sin. In some ways “go green” is being taught as the Eleventh Commandment (thou shalt drive a hybrid), and as usual I have a little different view on the spiritual side of this discussion.
The question that keeps popping up in my head as I hear green sermons and have green discussions with people is this: What is God’s perspective on “going green?” Is it really as big a deal to Him as it is to us? How concerned is God with our environment? If Jesus traveled by jet, would he buy a carbon offset? It is often taught that God is green and that being environmentally aware is vital to our spirituality. I’m not so sure.
The most famous scripture quotation would come from Genesis 1, in which God gives man authority over the earth, the vegetation, and the animals with the command to subdue to the earth and be fruitful and multiply. The interpretation is often that God’s command for man to “care for the earth” is really a command to “take care of the earth,” that our responsibility is to do our best to preserve it and protect it. But is that what God is saying? He could be saying, “I’m giving you the earth - do with it whatever you want -it’s yours.” In Isaiah God talks about how the grass will wither and the flower will fade, but the word of the Lord will stand forever. I interpret this as God saying, “Don’t get too invested in temporary things, but invest in what is eternal.” He presents the earth as being a temporary thing - a material thing, if you will. It will not always be here. God’s word is eternal. It will always be here. It will always stand. It is the only thing worth truly investing in. Biblically speaking, no matter what we do environmentally, no matter how green we get, the earth is eventually going to be destroyed anyway. It was never meant to last forever, so how concerned should we be in preserving it? In Genesis 6, God himself decides to flood the earth and start over (talk about a global warming crisis). He doesn’t seem too concerned there about “going green.” He does seem concerned with preserving righteousness.
The truth is, I just don’t find much in the bible that presents a strong spiritual argument for “going green.”
One day someone asked Jesus what the greatest commandment is. Jesus did not say to recycle or install solar panels on your house or to drive a hybrid. He did say this: “you shall love the Lord, your God, with all of your heart, soul, and mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: you shall love your neighbor as yourself. All of God’s laws hang on these two commandments.” It seems Jesus’ priority was less in how we treat the earth and more in how we treat the creator and the people of the earth.
Before you get too angry with me and misinterpret what I’m saying, let me be clear: As humans, we should try our best to be good stewards of the earth. As Christians, we should be the front runners in this movement. I’m not telling you to start throwing all of your trash on the side of the road or to start burning down forests or to start killing bunny rabbits or anything. Out of respect for our Creator, we should respect His creation. I just think we’re going about things the wrong way.
Instead of opening the newspaper and seeing articles about how to care for the environment, I would be delighted to see articles about how to care for people. Instead of seeing a movie star on TV talking about being green, I would like to see a movie star talking about being loving. Instead of governments imposing pollution taxes, I would like to see governments imposing uncompassionate taxes. Instead of Nobel prizes being awarded for environmental accomplishments, I would like to see Nobel prizes for evangelical accomplishments.
I think if we as humans became consumed with loving people, then our environment would be in a better state. Our world is going to great lengths and spending incredible amounts of money in the interest of the environment. What would our world look like if we went to such lengths and spent as much money in the interest of loving people?
The grass will wither. The flower will fade. The earth is temporary. God’s word and God’s ways will stand forever. You tell me which is more important.
I look forward to your comments.
The other day my family decided to take a beach day. We’ve been going hard and working hard and needed a little quality time, so we hit the beach to relax and play and just be with each other. My wife and I were having a great time just playing with our two boys. A grandmother and her grandson were walking down the beach and suddenly stopped next to us. Her grandson, being the same age as my son, was interested in what we were playing. The grandmother instructed him to introduce himself, and my son, being the socialite that he is , introduced himself back. Then the grandmother asked my 4 year old son (not me or my wife) if her grandson could play with him for a little while, to which my son, the socialite that he is, said yes.
What happened next has perplexed me for days. Upon making the proper introductions and luring out an invitation for her grandson, walked away. She actually said, “Well, that settles it. Everyone is happy now.” She then walked about 50 yards down the beach and sat down in her chair and proceeded to have her own personal beach day.
Everyone was not happy. Our family time, our escape had now been invaded. We had been scammed into a play-date. We had unwillingly become the babysitters of a complete stranger. And for the next half hour we were responsible for another person’s child that we did not even know.
In reflection, I realize that perhaps this grandmother needed a break from looking after the kid. He is young and full of energy, and she was old and I’m sure a little tired. But does that give her the liberty to pawn her kid off on us? She felt burdened, and she cast that burden on us.
You may think I’m overreacting, but think about it. She didn’t know anything about us. We didn’t know anything about us. What if her grandson took off and ran into the ocean? What if he stepped on an oyster shell and cut his foot open? What if he just got up and ran as fast as he could down the beach? Am I responsible? I felt that I was, and that was a burden I was not ready to carry for a complete stranger.
I still don’t know how to respond, and I guess that is why I’m blogging. On one hand, as a Christian, I feel that I should be willing to understand her burden, her weariness, and I should be willing to help her out for a little while. On the other hand, the whole reason we came to the beach was to relieve our own burdens, and now we just felt more burdened.
I think we often do this. We cast our burdens on other people. We feel so overwhelmed by life and situations, we feel helpless, and we put responsibility on other people to carry our burdens for us. In the context of some relationships, this is okay, this is the way it should be. I will gladly take on a family member’s burdens. I will gladly take on a co-worker’s burdens. I should - these are people I’m connected to. But what about the complete stranger? Am I responsibly for the poor and the hungry? Am I responsible for the drug addict? Am I responsible for the over-stressed grandmother on the beach?
Often I would say that I am not. But I’m beginning to think that I am.
I Peter says to cast your burdens on the Lord, because he cares for you. I Peter also says to be holy as the Lord is holy, which basically means, be like God. And if he willingly takes on people’s burdens, then maybe we should to.
What are your thoughts?
If you’ve ever seen “Field of Dreams” you know what that title is all about. The whole movie is about a son forgiving his father, and it has all of these simple phrases whispered throughout the film. We’ve all heard “If you build it, they will come.” The “ease his pain” phrase is not as popular, but recently it became quite essential to me.
I’ve been researching rather heavily the word “forgive,” and what I’m finding is changing everything I believe about relationships. I’ll try to share what I’m learning in detail but also be brief at the same time - however, please allow my thoughts to inspire you into a lifetime of thought on this subject.
When we commonly think of forgive we tend to think of pardoning a person, letting something slide, we may even consider it a way of forgetting a wrong that was done. We view it as passive, as quiet, as gentle - maybe even weak. It is the band-aid for a wound. It is a whisper in response to a scream.
In both Hebrew and Greek the meaning casts quite a different picture of forgiveness. These words convey action steps like “lift up,” “bear,” “carry,” “take hold of.” Lift up? Bear? Carry? Take hold of? Take hold of what? Bear what? Carry who? We often think of forgiveness as a way to put some space between ourselves and our offender, a way to relieve and heal our pain. But in understanding the Hebrew and Greek translations we receive instructions to move closer and closer and closer to the offender - so close that you can see every detail of his life - so close that you are almost under him - so close that you carry him.
To truly forgive someone we have to understand one simple fact - people project their inner most feelings. If in your inner most parts you are truly happy and at peace, then I doubt we will have much beef. But if you are hurting in some place, whether shallow or deep, whether conscious or sub-conscious, whether past or present - if you are hurting, that hurt is going to come out. And for me to truly forgive you is going to require me not to move away from you, not to put space between us, not to seek relief for myself. To truly forgive requires me to get close enough to you that I can learn where your hurt is coming from, and when I do learn I must take that pain upon myself and help you carry it until we can do something about it.
That is forgiveness - it is tough, it is laborious, it is frustrating, it is loud, and it is aggressive. True forgiveness is about easing another’s pain. And what better way to ease pain than to take it upon yourself.
Is this not what Jesus did? To truly forgive us he moved in closer - becoming human. To truly forgive us he eased our pain - he took it upon himself in the form of a cross.
So who needs forgiveness in your life? Do you know why they hurt you? Do you know where they are hurting? What’s it going to take for you to find out? What will be required for you to carry their pain? What will be required for you to truly forgive?
I was at a meeting the other night for my church. We were making decisions about how to spend money and such. We joked at one point about how, no matter how much money you’re spending, if you add the phrase “its for the kids,” it seems more acceptable to spend it. The idea is that the children are worth it.
A day before that we had our youngest son, Sam, dedicated at church. It is a beautiful ceremony in which my wife and I publicly declare our intent to raise our son in a godly way, to teach him to live in faith. My favorite part is when the pastor turns to the congregation and asks them if they will commit to helping us raise our child in this way by setting a proper example of a lifestyle of faith. It gives me chills to hear 300 people say unanimously, “We will!” And I believe them. I feel blessed to have so many people help me be a father and to have so many people who genuinely care about my children. Of course they say yes… its for the kids.
A friend of mine just started working at a home that treats mentally and emotionally challenged kids. That phrase is an understatement. These are children who have been abandoned, who have parents but not fathers and mothers. These are kids that will hug you just as quickly as they will try to stab you with a pencil or throw a desk at you. They are perpetually confused and they have no idea what trust or love is. This mainly results from the fact that since they were born, no one has truly cared for them, and when the encounter real love they don’t know how to respond. They have no congregation. They have no one saying, “but its for the kids.”
So we are sympathetic and we feel sorry for these children, and rightfully so. It is a crime to be a child who has no one to love you.
But the reality is that these kids will become adults. Their situation and their behavior and their problems may never change, but their age will. One day they will have to leave the home and live in the real world on their own. Things will only get worse because they will no longer be able to play the “kid” card. We just don’t seem to be as sympathetic toward adults. No one is saying, “but its for the adults.”
Maybe we should be saying that.
Jesus tells us to let the little children come to him. He also says that we all must come to him as children. Maybe he is inferring that we should all approach and accept each other as children. Maybe then our world would be a more compassionate one to live in.
Age doesn’t change our needs. Just as we deserved unconditional love and acceptance as children, we deserve it just as much, if not more, as adults.
So try to be a more compassionate person today. After all, its for the kids.
I have an irrational fear of toenails. I know it sounds like I’m crazy, and I probably am. But for whatever reason my skin crawls when I see people grooming their toenails. The thought of someone else touching my toenail makes me want to vomit, and I think if I had to watch a pedicure I might pass out.
Last night I was sitting next to a friend of mine in a group. It was kind of a formal meeting kind of thing, in which were suppossed to be listening to one person speak, etc. But it wasn’t too formal because this guy (wearing flip flops) began picking at his toenail. It was not over the top - he simply had his legs crossed, and for whatever reason began running his thumbnail back and forth underneath his toenail.
I could not hear anything. I could not focus on anything else. All I could see was this guy picking at his toe. If I could have leaned down and put my ear close enough, I’m pretty sure it would have sounded like someone pulling a metal comb down a chalkboard. I was beside myself to say the least.
Considering the environment and circumstance we were in, I felt it best and most polite to try to ignore the toenail thing and just focus on what we were doing. But I couldn’t. With each movement of his thumb, each pick at the toenail, I became more and more agitated. Finally, I burst out loud, interupting the whole meeting - “COULD YOU PLEASE STOP DOING THAT?!”
He obliged, but the rest of the group kind of looked at me funny for the rest of the night.
This is how bitterness works. The smallest, most insignificant action of another can just get under our skin, hurt our pride, offend us. But we try to hold it in or let it go. We try to be polite. We try to wait for the other person to change, for the other person to stop, for the other person to leave.
But what if they don’t?
If we keep holding it in and circumstances never change, we’re bound to blow up - an explosion of fury and frustration and bitterness over a little toenail. It seems ridiculous doesn’t it?
So what should I have done? I could have leaned over earlier and quietly explained to him my irrational phobia. I could have looked the other way. I could have closed my eyes. I could get therapy. I could have done anything and it would have been better than what I did (and less embarrassing). I would like to say that it was his responsibility to not pick at his toenails. But in reality I know that it is my problem to deal with. And if I don’t deal with it, if I don’t get over it, then the blow up is just going to happen again the next time somebody touches their toenails in front of me.
So what are your toenails? What are the little insignificant things that blow your top? And how can you deal with that? What can you do to let it go?
I lost my voice last week. I don’t mean that I was a little hoarse, I mean that I literally could not talk. Its never happened to me before, and, honestly, it was quite scary at times. A few occasions, out of habit, I tried to talk and then nothing would come out. Other times people would ask me questions, not realizing I could not talk, and I would just stare out them blankly or try to motion to my mouth, letting them know I could not talk. A few times I tried telepathy. Apparently it does not exist.
Two events during my voiceless days were more than frustrating. The morning I woke up discovering I could not speak, was the same morning I was scheduled to speak at a local FCA meeting. What do you do when you have been hired to be a keynote speaker, but have no voice? We used a computer and a projector, and it was quite comical. The other event came that evening when my wife and I went out with some friends to celebrate a birthday. It is a form of torture to enter into a social setting like that and have no voice. I just sat at the end of the table all night listening to everyone else. I listened to the tables around us too - sometimes those conversations were a little more entertaining, for instance, is a Wookie in the dog family or ape family? (see the original Star Wars movies if you don’t know what a Wookie is)
Perphaps the most frustrating of this whole experience was this: Having something to say, but not having a voice to say it with. First, I tried to just not communicate, but do you know how hard that is? I don’t think life is really possible without communication. Then I tried every way possible to communicate, aside from speaking, but without my voice all of my efforts seemed so futile. I was misunderstood. I was misinterpreted. I was brushed off. I was ignored at times. I was sympathized with at times, but still not listened to. But mostly, I just was not heard.
Can you relate? See, I don’t think you have to physically lose your voice to experience this. Many of us feel like this daily. We feel like we have something to say, but no voice to say it with. At work, In a relationship, As a parent, As a spouse, As a teacher, As a student… we are misunderstood, misinterpreted, brushed off, ignored, sympathized with, but not listened to. Mostly, we just are not heard.
More importantly, we have a responsibility as listeners to make sure we are hearing the voices around us. Are you sure you understand what is being said to you? Or do you just casually make your own interpretation or blow the person off? Do you just simply sympathize, or do you really listen?
Here is the real question of the day: Who is responsible for proper communication? The speaker or the listener? For example, if you are not being heard, is it the listener who is at fault, or should you find a more effective method of communication?
Direct your comments to this question and share your stories too.
My wife is about to have another baby - our second! Throughout the prenatal process I am constantly amazed at the miracle of life, and equally amazed at technology. We saw a 4-D ultrasound picture of our child that had such incredible detail that it looked like there was a camera inside my wife’s womb. This ultrasound machine can measure the baby and tell you how much he weighs. It predicts when he will be born. It listens to his heartbeat. All of that stuff is absolutely amazing.
Then there is the comical side of the doctor’s office. We’re doing a scheduled C-Section, so we have these conversations with our doctor that sound very similar to if we were scheduling lunch. ”How does Wednesday work for you? How about Monday? Morning or afternoon? When is it convenient for you to bring a human life into this world?”
And you have never experienced the world awkward until your doctor has tried to carry on a normal conversation with you (i.e. weather, golf, etc) while at the same time checking your wife’s cervix.
But the most amazing thing about pregnancy is the amazingly ridiculous things people will say and do. They ask really stupid questions like, “Are you ready?” What do you think? How would you feel if you had a 7 pound person inside of you moving around and practicing karate with your bladder? How would you feel if everytime you sat down it became hard for you to breathe, but everytime you stood up your feet swelled with fluid making it difficult to walk? Instead of getting an answer, I think it would be more fair to sprinkle these people with bacon bits, duct tape a badger to their stomach, and then ask them if they are ready to get the badger off. Let’s not forget that when God kicked Adam and Eve out of the garden, pregnancy was part of Eve’s punishment. Adam’s punishment was sharing a bed with a pregnant woman (If Mama ain’t sleeping, ain’t nobody sleeping).
Take note people - it is never okay to say any of the following phrases to a pregnant woman: ”Are you sure you’re not having twins? Wow, your stomach looks bigger now than it did 5 minutes ago. Man, you look huge. You look like you’re ready to pop. You look miserable. I just dropped my keys, can you pick them up for me?”
Say things like, “You look amazing. You are glowing. From behind, you don’t even look pregnant. Oh, you can’t be that far along. Would you like a foot rub?”
It is also never okay to touch a pregnant woman’s belly unless you are blood related, I don’t care how often you see them or how well you know them. Blood lines only, people.
In all seriousness, bringing a child into the world is truly an adventure. We are very excited about our new addition, and it is worth all the humor and pain and stupidity we have to endure in the meantime. Pray for us as our journey comes to an end soon and a new journey begins.
